Post by Cyborg on Feb 12, 2007 17:03:35 GMT
Hmmm well ill try to make this short
Started using staff( I wanted to be Darth Maul!) I just begun roaming random servers not knowing what was going on.
Then i started to get to know the game a bit more, so i decided to join a clan. So i joined SFW(Shadow fighting warriors!) Met a guy named Predator, and i really liked him. Clan was good, very active.
But then Battlefront 1 came, and i just played that instead. Was great! But one day i thought lets see how jka is. So i go looking for my clan,but with no sucess . Saddened i just freelanced and picked up any skills i could (like being a jawa!)
Then i met this guy called Party Boy. He was one of the few ppl who didnt call me a staff noob He decided to make a clan called TJG so i joined it. Was cool, he made a website, but it didnt last long. Members left. Party Boy decided to close the clan, so i was the last TJG
After this i just freelanced from server to server, meeting a few ppl, none i remeber now tho
Few months later i thought its time to quit, so i went to my local game store to trade in the game, but they didnt take pc games! But in a weird way im glad they didnt, or else i would never of meant Princess Jawa aka Padme!
She was in xXx, im not sure what happened to that. Then CA came. I thought, yeah! this is the clan to join, but then it died So when clerics came i definately jumped at the opportunity to join.
And now im here, using single(yes im no longer a noob!) and in a great clan
P.S imo staff is great! but as Bourne once told me, single is more versatile
MODIFICATIONS: 1. Met ceyl 2. Pwned legacy. ok cool.
Ok ill continue from where I left off.
New Age
At this point in my life jka was perhaps too important to me, in sense that I felt that I had to progress, to gain new skills and playing styles. Many considered the best staff player, or at least a good one, but it wasn¡¦t enough for me. I needed more. I have a sort of hunger to excel at things I know that I can do well at.
So I started to train myself, picking up a skills from some of the greatest fighters, such as CorruptMind, Iniatha and Twitch. I even went so far as to write down what they had taught as a kind of insurance that I would not forget! To many this would seem like an obsession, but to me it was fun, and exciting. It gave me something to look forward to after school, or when I was down or unhappy.
Distorted vision
I mostly trained on the cleric server, with people I knew, who encouraged me greatly, and made me more determined to improve and improve. Eventually I left the sanctuary of the password server (!) and left into the unknown (scary looking servers with scary names ƒ¼ ) Tbh I got bored of the same people lol, and I didn¡¦t like the way we would seclude ourselves from other players. I like to be free. I also stopped posting on the forum for a while, I kind of lost faith in the whole virtues thing due to some peoples actions, and stuff. At times I felt alone, but I felt that it was for the best, to get some fresh air, and flush out the waste¡K
Zenith and Obsession
So I started lurking around other servers, started to get known more, learning new skills. I never got trained full-time by anyone, but I used to watch how others would fight. Lol I remember fighting with people, and when I couldn¡¦t beat them I would spec them, or just watch from a distance. There skill was beautiful to me, it was something graceful and immense. I decided to form my own style based on many who I had seen, sort of patching together little fragments into something new, complex but clear cut.
This is when jka became my life. I think this was the point where I was failing at stuff in real life, and so I wanted to succeed at something for once, and this was going to be it. My dream was to be good. I thought I would just go just far enough to be just good. But I got corrupted, and too hungry for more. I would love it when people would say ¡¥You are the best in jka¡¦, or ¡¥Are you haxing¡¦ or ¡¥crazy jawa.¡¦ It made me happy.
So I kept on progressing in skills, rigorously setting myself goals, 100 kills in 26 mins was my first target to beat. If I didn¡¦t reach it, I would think ¡¥tommorrow, or later ill try again¡¦. Of course to get scores like this you need a big server, at least 13-14 players, so again I was drawn away from the cleric server in my obsession to be pro.
I used to hate it when I saw others who would beat my scores, or kill me. I used to memorise their attacks, forming new ones to counter theirs. Success drove me on, made me more focused. So I kept on joining different servers, reaching 100 kills, making my own new records, taking screenies(!) getting more rep. It was exhilarating, the adrenaline rush I got from it was immense, I used to sweat in my seat¡K.I didn¡¦t really want the fame, but I wasn¡¦t going to complain.
I felt my peak, where I felt like I had achieved a level of some ¡¥leetness¡¦ was when I got 100 in 14 mins, but I didn¡¦t take a screenie cause I felt that I had reached something for myself. I didn¡¦t need to take screenies anymore to remind me of my skill, or to make me feel l33t, or to show off to others. I felt complete as if I had achieved something great in my life! ( I know im so sad ƒ¼) I deleted all my screenies, and began to descend into a depressive state, where i had to play, it wasn¡¦t a choice.
Depression
You would think once I had reached my apparent goal that I would have stopped but I couldn¡¦t, I was hooked. I used to play whenever I could, when my parents were out the house, or were sleeping. My eyes and wrists started to get screwed up. I have to wear contacts now! But I kept playing, until I reached a stage where I knew I would have to stop if I was going to pass my exams. But I still continued. I did well, but I could have done better. I started to feel bitter, angry that I had even bought this game. It affected my relations with my parents, and they still don¡¦t trust me to this day on the comp. Good friends from cleric which I was a bit more involved in now helped me kind of recover, and see that you could play without pain or obsession. But I felt that I needed to quit completely, forever.
I became leader of cleric for a short time, but I rather neglected my job. I felt that maybe this new role would give me a new aim, or determination, but it didn¡¦t, I and I decided to leave clerics completely.
Also the pressure of people wanting to beat me was too much for me to handle, and I didn¡¦t really want to be beaten, I liked being seen as the best, probably a title that I was given for far too long.
I played for a it more under different names, but eventually I was forced to stop playing when I cd smashed. I was happy cause I was free now.
Conclusion
Looking back over I think 4 years, I¡¦ve had a good time, met many friends (but I think they just wanted my hax ƒ¼). But I had to let go, and I feel free now, free from the chains of jka¡K
OK THAT FELT WEIRD, OK WHATS THE MORAL OF THE STORY:
1. BE NOOB
2. WITH PLEASURE COMES PAIN
3. DON¡¦T BE LIKE CYBORG LOL
*Ok sorry if it sounded like I was boasting or anything but this is only my viewpoint and I am not liable for any misconceptions or bad feelings anyone feels.*
Started using staff( I wanted to be Darth Maul!) I just begun roaming random servers not knowing what was going on.
Then i started to get to know the game a bit more, so i decided to join a clan. So i joined SFW(Shadow fighting warriors!) Met a guy named Predator, and i really liked him. Clan was good, very active.
But then Battlefront 1 came, and i just played that instead. Was great! But one day i thought lets see how jka is. So i go looking for my clan,but with no sucess . Saddened i just freelanced and picked up any skills i could (like being a jawa!)
Then i met this guy called Party Boy. He was one of the few ppl who didnt call me a staff noob He decided to make a clan called TJG so i joined it. Was cool, he made a website, but it didnt last long. Members left. Party Boy decided to close the clan, so i was the last TJG
After this i just freelanced from server to server, meeting a few ppl, none i remeber now tho
Few months later i thought its time to quit, so i went to my local game store to trade in the game, but they didnt take pc games! But in a weird way im glad they didnt, or else i would never of meant Princess Jawa aka Padme!
She was in xXx, im not sure what happened to that. Then CA came. I thought, yeah! this is the clan to join, but then it died So when clerics came i definately jumped at the opportunity to join.
And now im here, using single(yes im no longer a noob!) and in a great clan
P.S imo staff is great! but as Bourne once told me, single is more versatile
MODIFICATIONS: 1. Met ceyl 2. Pwned legacy. ok cool.
Ok ill continue from where I left off.
New Age
At this point in my life jka was perhaps too important to me, in sense that I felt that I had to progress, to gain new skills and playing styles. Many considered the best staff player, or at least a good one, but it wasn¡¦t enough for me. I needed more. I have a sort of hunger to excel at things I know that I can do well at.
So I started to train myself, picking up a skills from some of the greatest fighters, such as CorruptMind, Iniatha and Twitch. I even went so far as to write down what they had taught as a kind of insurance that I would not forget! To many this would seem like an obsession, but to me it was fun, and exciting. It gave me something to look forward to after school, or when I was down or unhappy.
Distorted vision
I mostly trained on the cleric server, with people I knew, who encouraged me greatly, and made me more determined to improve and improve. Eventually I left the sanctuary of the password server (!) and left into the unknown (scary looking servers with scary names ƒ¼ ) Tbh I got bored of the same people lol, and I didn¡¦t like the way we would seclude ourselves from other players. I like to be free. I also stopped posting on the forum for a while, I kind of lost faith in the whole virtues thing due to some peoples actions, and stuff. At times I felt alone, but I felt that it was for the best, to get some fresh air, and flush out the waste¡K
Zenith and Obsession
So I started lurking around other servers, started to get known more, learning new skills. I never got trained full-time by anyone, but I used to watch how others would fight. Lol I remember fighting with people, and when I couldn¡¦t beat them I would spec them, or just watch from a distance. There skill was beautiful to me, it was something graceful and immense. I decided to form my own style based on many who I had seen, sort of patching together little fragments into something new, complex but clear cut.
This is when jka became my life. I think this was the point where I was failing at stuff in real life, and so I wanted to succeed at something for once, and this was going to be it. My dream was to be good. I thought I would just go just far enough to be just good. But I got corrupted, and too hungry for more. I would love it when people would say ¡¥You are the best in jka¡¦, or ¡¥Are you haxing¡¦ or ¡¥crazy jawa.¡¦ It made me happy.
So I kept on progressing in skills, rigorously setting myself goals, 100 kills in 26 mins was my first target to beat. If I didn¡¦t reach it, I would think ¡¥tommorrow, or later ill try again¡¦. Of course to get scores like this you need a big server, at least 13-14 players, so again I was drawn away from the cleric server in my obsession to be pro.
I used to hate it when I saw others who would beat my scores, or kill me. I used to memorise their attacks, forming new ones to counter theirs. Success drove me on, made me more focused. So I kept on joining different servers, reaching 100 kills, making my own new records, taking screenies(!) getting more rep. It was exhilarating, the adrenaline rush I got from it was immense, I used to sweat in my seat¡K.I didn¡¦t really want the fame, but I wasn¡¦t going to complain.
I felt my peak, where I felt like I had achieved a level of some ¡¥leetness¡¦ was when I got 100 in 14 mins, but I didn¡¦t take a screenie cause I felt that I had reached something for myself. I didn¡¦t need to take screenies anymore to remind me of my skill, or to make me feel l33t, or to show off to others. I felt complete as if I had achieved something great in my life! ( I know im so sad ƒ¼) I deleted all my screenies, and began to descend into a depressive state, where i had to play, it wasn¡¦t a choice.
Depression
You would think once I had reached my apparent goal that I would have stopped but I couldn¡¦t, I was hooked. I used to play whenever I could, when my parents were out the house, or were sleeping. My eyes and wrists started to get screwed up. I have to wear contacts now! But I kept playing, until I reached a stage where I knew I would have to stop if I was going to pass my exams. But I still continued. I did well, but I could have done better. I started to feel bitter, angry that I had even bought this game. It affected my relations with my parents, and they still don¡¦t trust me to this day on the comp. Good friends from cleric which I was a bit more involved in now helped me kind of recover, and see that you could play without pain or obsession. But I felt that I needed to quit completely, forever.
I became leader of cleric for a short time, but I rather neglected my job. I felt that maybe this new role would give me a new aim, or determination, but it didn¡¦t, I and I decided to leave clerics completely.
Also the pressure of people wanting to beat me was too much for me to handle, and I didn¡¦t really want to be beaten, I liked being seen as the best, probably a title that I was given for far too long.
I played for a it more under different names, but eventually I was forced to stop playing when I cd smashed. I was happy cause I was free now.
Conclusion
Looking back over I think 4 years, I¡¦ve had a good time, met many friends (but I think they just wanted my hax ƒ¼). But I had to let go, and I feel free now, free from the chains of jka¡K
OK THAT FELT WEIRD, OK WHATS THE MORAL OF THE STORY:
1. BE NOOB
2. WITH PLEASURE COMES PAIN
3. DON¡¦T BE LIKE CYBORG LOL
*Ok sorry if it sounded like I was boasting or anything but this is only my viewpoint and I am not liable for any misconceptions or bad feelings anyone feels.*